Sharon Melnick

Thank you for being patient with me as I finished my book Success under Stress, I've missed you! In the last few weeks, I gave a number of trainings at companies like Procter and Gamble, Pfizer, and GE so I had a chance to talk to a lot of business professionals like you.  One of the themes I heard was the importance of turning obstacles into opportunity.  According to Accenture (2010), 71% of senior executives say it is the trait they are looking for in making retention and promotion choices. Business owners who can do this well keep their business afloat...

You tell yourself that you "really need to" do something to turn your situation around, and are baffled why you don't. Each day you do the same things and sink deeper into your stressful situation and personal misery. The first step to taking action is knowing what your block is. One way you can start to get clarity is to set aside time to do the project that you know you've been needing to do. Write it into your calendar, protect the time, and have serious intent to carry it through. When it comes time to do it, notice what...

Do you want to know how to relax more?

Elite athletes, such as the two champions who recently operated at their peak performance for a five-hour tennis match, demonstrate an optimal natural pattern to their exertion. It is a Sprint/Recovery pattern, in which you focus intensely and then recover and replenish your energy by doing something that fully disengages the parts of your brain focused on work. It effectively rejuvenates you. For most of us, the optimum pattern is 90 minutes of intense focus followed by renewal. This number is based on our natural circadian rhythms that go in 90 minute cycles throughout the day.

Can you figure out which of these myths about confidence is fact and which is fiction? 1) If your ratio of positive to negative thoughts is less than 3:1 everyday, you will take two years off of your life. (Answer:  TRUE.   According to a Mayo Clinic study, your doubting, questioning,  self critical thoughts wear and tear at your body, and can significantly affect the longevity of your life.  This is serious, folks!) 2) Confident people earn much more than self doubters over their lifetime (for lower earning jobs: on average $28,000 over a lifetime; for higher earning jobs: hundreds of thousands of dollars more). (Answer:  TRUE, according...

Do you ever worry about what is going to happen in the future? It’s not anything specific, or maybe it’s many specific challenges that are all adding up. You might even know your anxiety is ‘irrational’ but that doesn’t help! Here are two approaches you can use to ‘think positive’ and get back into a state where you have ease and can concentrate. Focus on the Moment Focus on the specific physical feeling you are having in your body, not on your thoughts. For example, say to yourself slowly, “I feel tension in my shoulders; I have a sinking feeling in...

"We had a plan in place to move forward with pricing. She was in the situation and just went with the idea that came to her mind. She needs to think instead of react.” My client's boss' comment about her performance. My sister in law told me about her day last week as a pre-school teacher: “I came home and snapped at the kids.” How about you? Do you think, or do you react..some would say "over-react?" Usually when you react it is because you perceive that something is beyond your control, and will either lead to a bad outcome (i.e., my client...

This morning I was sitting in a Board meeting. Here’s the scenario: I’m a brand new member, it’s my first meeting, and I don’t have as much experience in the field as other people on the Board. You can imagine what I was tempted to think: “Should I speak up?” or “Will they think what I say is stupid?” This topic was on my mind because several of the participants in my ‘just-ended’ Confidence at the Core* program were afraid of speaking up and taking a stand when they started the program six weeks ago. But now they say “I am confident....

Now, a word about the goals you've just set for this year: 92% of people don't follow through on New Year's Resolutions or adhere to their Goal Planning by January 10th so this is NOT another blog about setting goals and keeping resolutions! Yes, its important to have SMART goals and to plan out your year. But writing down goals and plans is not what will make them actualize? YOU have to make them come true. You can get so wrapped up in doing tasks that you forget the real secret to having the BEST year of your life: your success...

Have you known it all along?  Have you tried to hide it from other people,  but inside you KNOW you are a still a people pleaser (even at this age)? Do you recognize yourself in these common signs of people pleasing?Spend your time doing favors for other people instead of getting your own work done Worry about how your comments in meetings will be judged,  so you second guess what they want to hear, give measured responses, or freeze up Say "yes" when you'd like to say "no" to others, or go along with what they want instead of speaking up about...

Do people tell you they really like you, or they think you are great at what you do - but still inside you don't think you are 'enough?' Do you criticize yourself to try and motivate yourself, but wind up stressed and no closer to success? Here's the irony: You work so hard for other people to think well of you, and once they do you don't even accept their compliments. You work so hard to achieve progress, and once you do, you just set the bar higher and keep working harder. That doesn't bring much enjoyment or peace of mind; just more...