Yearning for a more fulfilling love life? Here's a down and dirty list on how to succeed at getting it.
In some parallel universe, sex is perfect. Not only is it always flat-out fantastic; you get precisely what you want without asking.
|Be a Better Man in Bed|
|9 ways to spice up your sex life|
|Communication and Commitment|
|Wilder Side of Sex|
Use positive words and phrases, says Kevin Gogin, a marriage and family counselor. "I thought it would be fun if ..."
It may seem awkward to give a tutorial in the middle of lovemaking, but practice makes perfect.
When you put the pressure on, the message is, "You better give me what I deserve." Asking instead of telling makes your request a choice.
The more you take interest in what thrills her, the more she will want to do likewise.
Expressing your likes, writes Dr. Miriam Stoppard in The Magic Of Sex, "doesn't mean ... you might express a different preference on a different occasion."
Before you whip out the handcuffs, "start with something simple," advises Michael Castleman in Sexual Solutions.
Do you give her a foot rub without prompting? Do you seek him out the second you walk in the door? Work on giving each other what you want on many levels.
Sex may be an important part of your life, but a single experience is not. Keep it fun and playful.
And put them in writing, suggests Tracey Cox, author of Hot Relationships. Each person lists 10 things he or she would like to do in bed. Trade lists. Ditch what you can't agree on.